Goddess, I Am.

Chin once told me that she envied my portable life. That was back in 2007 when I packed up and left for Thailand.

Everything I owned could fit in a single suitcase. I was free to come and go whenever I pleased. Those were among the best days of my life, and like Chin then, I envy my portable life now.

These days, I’m feeling that all too familiar restlessness again, that itch go someplace far and exotic – not for a few days’ holiday, but to stay for a while, to stay indefinitely. And in theory, I could. After all, that’s the beauty of working online. I don’t have to worry about how I’m going to feed and shelter myself in some exciting foreign land.

But a theory is all it is for me now, now that I’m married and can never think solely for myself ever again. My life is still fairly portable (or I can make it so in a heartbeat because I don’t exactly go crazy on wholesale appliances). Why, I can give away most of my clothing and my shoes and my books and I won’t even bat an eyelash. All I need are a few t-shirts, some underwear, a few pairs of pants, my laptop, my iPad, and my camera, and I’m a happy camper. The Husband, however, is another story.

You see, he gets very attached to things, like his huge-ass TV and home theater system, his hundreds of Blu-Ray movies, his electric couch, and even the goddamned refrigerator. Most of these things traveled all the way from England to Thailand when he moved to Bangkok in 2006, and again from Thailand to the Philippines in 2008. When we do move again, he’s going to insist on taking all of these with us, plus everything else we’ve bought since.

And if you’ve ever had to go through the ordeal of moving furniture and appliances from one country to another, you’ll know it’s not a walk in the park. So it goes without saying that moving from one country to another on a whim is out of the question, and when we do move again, it’ll have to be a big one (read: for good) to make the most out of the time, money, and gargantuan effort that transporting his stuff will demand.

Heavens, why do material things have to make life so complicated?

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When I was a kid, I wanted a pony. I begged, pleaded, and cajoled, but I never did get a pony. Instead, throughout my life, I got a hell of a lot of dogs, a few cats, a few freshwater fishes (one of ‘em was a piranha named Pete), a couple of sailfin lizards, 3 runaway Philippine hanging parrots (locally known as the kulasisi), and – believe it or not – a squirrel.

I haven’t had a pet in ages, and I do miss having one every so often. It’s just that right now, the house isn’t very pet-friendly with all The Husband’s electronics lying around, and I’m simply too busy to take any real responsibility for one.

But say, hypothetically, we do get a pet someday, I would want one of these:

1. A giraffe. I cannot explain it, but I am fascinated by giraffes. The first time I ever saw a real one in Bangkok’s Dusit Zoo, I burst into hysterical tears. I kid you not.

I know it’ll be a chore to get one in one of those Duramax Storage Sheds, but perhaps I can get away with having one in the (future) backyard? I’m not sure, however, exactly how the neighbors will take to it, truth be told.

2. A capybara. I’m thinking I could probably get away with one easily. I mean, a Labrador-sized rodent should be easy enough to hide, right?

I know I could give them an excellent home; there are no anacondas in the Philippines, after all!

3. An alpaca. Seriously, how cute are alpacas? And they’re pretty handy, too. Apparently, good alpaca fleece can be a real money-maker, so in theory, you have a pet that pays for itself.

I read that there are more alpacas bred in Australia now than in South America. So there really is no reason why they can’t be raised in the Philippines. Or so I told The Husband. Who did not look entirely convinced, by the way.

So right now, it’s looking like we’ll probably end up with a cat, or a teeny bichon fraise, and probably a few fishes. Eventually, maybe.

I’ve gone off the idea of living in huge cities after living in Bangkok for a while, but these days I’ve found myself wishing that I lived in Manila – all because many of my online buddies won’t stop talking about attending this or that Sex and the City 2 advanced screening at this or that cinema in the capital. Really, it sucks having to wait until the 2nd of June to see it here in Cebu when it’s been out since the 27th of May everywhere else.

I am, however, taking solace in the fact that this time around, I will be watching it with my ladies. When Sex and the City: The Movie came out two years ago, I was still in Bangkok where I had zero girlfriends, so I had no one else to watch it with but The Husband, who spent half the time bitching and moaning that his balls were shrinking and that Sarah Jessica Parker needed a horse tack – a sentiment shared by most men that I find really offensive, by the way, because I personally think SJP is GORGEOUS! And as much as I love The Husband, this is one movie I would rather watch with ladies who can appreciate everything that SATC represents.

Okay, I’m off to get those first-day tickets before they run out.

It’s been nearly two years since The Husband and I moved out of Thailand, and truly, there is no love lost between myself and the Thais. I’ve never made it a secret that I like most of them as much as I like fitness equipment (which I don’t). In fact, I’ve even written a nasty thing – or two! – about them at some point. Still, no matter how much I dislike the majority of the Thai population, I never ever would’ve wished the horrible events of the past few weeks (or has it been months already?) on a place I called home for over a year and a half.

The fact that I actually care enough to keep myself informed of what’s going on is quite surprising, really. I never thought I would, but I guess there’s something very horribly disconcerting about seeing a myriad of streets and buildings and even freakin’ 7-11s that should have been familiar but are now barely recognizable from all the damage that’s been done.

And as shallow as this may sound, what shook me most was seeing Central World Plaza burning. I cannot count the many Sundays I’ve spent taking refuge in Central or in Siam Paragon next door because I was a new girl in a strange city and had absolutely no idea how to get around. Siam was the easiest place for me to get to back then, so week after lonely week I would journey to that crowded, bustling place, and sit and read or write beside the fountains, or meander from shop to shop, daydreaming as I did so. For me, it was the place of first dates and glorious IMAX movies and expensive wifi, and by the time I finally left the city, I could’ve probably walked through the area all the way to Pratunam, or Chulalongkorn University, or Soi Nana, or even Silom blindfolded. Why, I probably still could.

Oh, Bangkok. How I grieve for you! Once upon a time, you helped a girl finally find herself. I hope, after all that’s been said and done, your people will help you do the same.

For the longest time, I’ve been using The Husband’s battered, old ‘Pixar’ lamp. I call it such because it’s exactly the same kind of lamp that hops in those Pixar movies. Unfortunately, the poor thing has traveled with him from London to Bangkok to Cebu, so it really is quite battered now.

Sometime after Christmas, I finally decided to pick up a new lamp. So off we went to CAMG in Parkmall (definitely one of my favorite shops EVER) to look around. The place carries stuff from IKEA, mostly lamps, so I was quite happy poking around the place all afternoon. Mind you, I wouldn’t know if they’re genuine IKEA or not, but I’m inclined to think so. (I’m also crushing on a plush, pink chair, but I refuse to think about it.)

Now, I originally had my eye on a white IKEA lamp, which was on sale (30% off!). But just as I was about to buy it, something pink and pretty caught my eye. It was one of those tactile lamps that would light up no matter where you touched it, and it was down from P2,500 to P1,500, so I bought it on the spot.

The uber helpful salespeople then rang it up through one of those barcode scanners – and promptly told me that I couldn’t have the lightbulbs! Well, I’m not one to make a fuss over something as trivial as lightbulbs, so I asked the guy to write down in detail the kind of bulbs that I needed for the lamp. And because there was no hardware shop to be found in Parkmall and it was quite late to go elsewhere, I figured my lamp could wait one night.

The next day, The Husband and I went to True Value in Ayala to get the E-14 bulbs that were required. We couldn’t find the round ones, but since the guy only specified E-14s, we figured any bulb of that sort would be okay. That night, we tried the bulbs on the lamp – and it exploded! And just like that, my pretty pink lamp was dead.

The next day found us back in CAMG. After all, I wasn’t about to write off a 1-day-old exploding lamp just like that. The staff was fantastic, though. They immediately offered to replace it. Unfortunately, the only colors they had left for the same kind of lamp were a tacky gold and a gloomy black, and I wasn’t about to settle for anything less than what I wanted.

And then my eyes settled on the white IKEA lamp that first caught my eye. I told them that I’d take it instead, and they let me – for P600 more. This time, I made sure that the guy talked to The Husband about the lightbulbs required, so there can be no more scary explosions. Thankfully, it works with the spare lightbulbs that The Husband normally has lying around, so I now have an awesome new lamp that is somehow making my bedtime reading 20 times more pleasurable.

On my desk chair: IKEA lamp, Antony and Cleopatra by Colleen McCullough, Moleskine planner, and Squirt (from Finding Nemo), the stuffed turtle that The Husband bought for me on our last trip to Hongkong Disneyland in 2007

Next project: a couple of proper bedside tables. Right now, the green chair is just so . . . WRONG.